Devastated

I was so angry yesterday. I made an appointment with a friend for going out, since I need to find a trouser. He agreed, but on the next day he cancelled it. The reason he gave was he was tired. The next one was someone had invited him to a dinner. Then he added, he would see this person for the last time. What a crap!!!! How can he be so inconsisten? He made an appointment with me first. Later someone called and he just cancelled it like that without rejecting the invitation. I mean, if this person is going to be away soon, he would have inform my friend sooner and not abrupt. I hate this kind of attitude. You can already know, that this kind of person will betray you in the future. That's why I will keep my distance with him and won't bother to be his closest friend again. What a shit!!!!

All he thinks is only his own comfort. I know, accompanying me won't give him any advantage. Being invited to a dinner is much better, because he'll get something to eat ... FOR FREE! I didn't actually know that he was this kind of type who uses his friends for his own good until someone opened my eyes. I used to ignore this, because we were close before. But it seems that he's being more unreasonable from time to time. Well, one thing for sure is that I need to make a decision. This is the situation which I hate. How come I always feel so devastated? I always try to be there for the ones whom I care, but they never seem to be there when I need them. This is the life of an adult. Perhaps I'm predestined to stand on my own and be there for others. But, it sucks!!! Or perhaps I expect too much. That's something I need to learn probably ... expect less and not give too much out of me. I know, I watch too many films and get influenced by them. Films represent mostly the perfect situations which most people long of. In the end, they're just dreams which are difficult to be made coming true.

It's the matter of give and take ... I guess, I should expect less, although I may give more